Click here to read about the Agora-Poetry series!
The final Agora-Poetry post! Wow! Thank you so much to everyone who’s come along with me for the journey.
And, speaking of people who came along with me for the journey, on the final day of this challenge, I decided to go on an outing with my friends.
Pre-COVID, these outings did not scare me. If someone asked me to hang out, I was always down. Surprisingly, my anxiety never interfered. Having others around me was sort of a buffer. In my mind, if I was part of a group of friends or even with another family member or my partner, the attention of others would be focused on me as part of a unit, not as a single person. That meant I could be free of fears regarding others’ judgement, and be my true self.
However, as I’m sure many of us have experienced, going out during a pandemic can be a stressful experience.
This would be my first time venturing out to anywhere that wasn’t a park since March. It has been 6 months since I had set foot on a high-street, 6 months since I had eaten at a restaurant, 6 months since I had been able to enjoy that feeling of dressing up and getting ready to go somewhere.
Needless to say, I was ready.
As we got closer and closer to the restaurant, I felt my heartbeat start speeding up. What if I wasn’t careful and accidentally brought COVID back home to my family? What if the restaurant wasn’t cleaned properly? What if I was the only person wearing a mask outside and I was the odd one out?
Weirdly, my attention during the meal was drawn away from my anxiety, not just because of my friends and the delicious food, but a wasp. Now, I HATE wasps! But during our meal, two of them kept flying around our food. One went into my lemonade, which was disappointing and annoying. So, I ordered another one…
And the other one went into that can!! 😠😠😠😠😠
In an odd way, I’m grateful that that was the case. It made my outing feel more normal.
By focusing on those tiny things (or tiny, annoying bugs!!) around you that make up your day, things can seem a little easier, with anxiety and COVID. Sipping that tea you love, taking a walk outside or journaling. Use whatever means are at your disposal to keep fighting! Don’t give up!
Push yourself to your limits, because when you do, wonderful things can happen 💗